Letting Grace Write The Narrative of Your Life

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Big Idea: You can't give grace to others if I don't have it first. 

Receiving is the First Step to Giving

I knew this lady once. She was a mom of two, and her kids could be pretty unruly. She was a young mom, and she tended to get really visibly upset when they would start acting up. 

Right in front of me, she would reprimand her kids in a way that was frustrated. Mean, even. It always made me feel really uncomfortable. 

Obviously disciplining kids is important, and there's a way to do it in love. I'm not saying parents shouldn't do that. But the way we do it matters. 

Doing it harshly, and red-faced with a raised voice? There is no grace in that. 

That's what made me uncomfortable. It was the thought that creeped that that she always talked to them like that. All the time. I couldn't believe that someone could do that.

The Pendulum

Just as there's a way to discipline kids with love, there's also a way to do it that hurts their heart. And unfortunately, that's what I was seeing. 

When I thought back on it recently, the Lord spoke something to me and suddenly it made sense. 

She wasn't able to give her kids grace because she herself did not have it. 

How a someone parents their child is often how they feel the Father parents them. 

Now, this is not a parenting blog, so I won't get too deep into this, but here's how this tends to play out...

If you're a helicopter parent, maybe it's because you believe that what you do is never sufficient. Maybe you deal with regret for past mistakes, and now you run your affairs like a military sergeant whipping yourself and others into shape, but you feel this is necessary to accomplish important tasks. You get things done, but other people find it constricting. 

Some swing all the way on the other side of the pendulum. An apathetic parent, fails to show a child enough attention to make them feel loved, and it is because love and care is distant from them. 

This Isn't Just About Parenting

But this nugget of wisdom from the Lord (thanks God), goes so much deeper than parenting. 

It helps us understand human nature, and how the way we view God and our relationship with Him totally affects how we treat others. 

There are so many reasons why it is important to have a relationship with God - I literally couldn't count them all if I tried - but this is one of them.

Other people may be actively damaged by the fact that you are damaged. 

And we tend to treat others how we have been treated. 

Knowing that we have to have grace to give it allows us to understand and empathize with people who don't show us grace. 

So, in some ways, this revelation cuts us some slack! Yay, us!

But in another sense, it is a convicting reminder...

That if we don't allow the Father to lavish his love on us, and deposit his love into our hearts, we will not be able to pour into others in a meaningful way because we cannot give what we do not have. 

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~ The Upcoming Blog ~

Why does receiving grace from God for all your shortcomings, insecurities, mistakes and secrets change the way you treat others?

Read more about it in the upcoming blog, How Our Perspective Can Shape Our Reality on The Way Everlasting Blog.